Mahatria, I do so much for everybody, but I feel nobody even thinks about me. How do I deal with this feeling?
Woman is naturally loving, but you don’t love yourself. Somehow, we think its selfishness, loving ourselves. You can only give the world what you have.
When you love yourself and you love the world, the quality of that love is very different. When you don’t love yourself and attempt to love the world, there is a sacrificial intent in it.
You feel like you’re all the time… And, along with it comes a lot of frustration. At every given time, there’s a craving for reciprocation, there is a craving for acknowledgement.
There’s a craving for recognition for what you have done, because, when a woman gets frustrated, this is normally her sentences in frustration. “I’ve done so much for all of you.
Still nobody recognizes.” Why do you have to beg for recognition? Why do you have to beg for craving?
That’s because you have not loved yourself enough! If you have loved yourself enough, then loving the world will not seem sacrificial for you.
It’s like the flower is giving its fragrance, and it’s going beyond the flower. You’re just growing so much in love, that you continue to be the center of your love, but the circumference of your love keeps growing all the time.
But if you don’t love yourself, there is no center to this circle, and it’s always very, very volatile, very, very frustrating. And most importantly, you develop this craving to be acknowledged.
You feel your children should come and tell you, because of you only, you feel your husband should come and tell you, because of you only.
You feel your extended family should come and tell you, because of you only. And they may be feeling because of you, but they may not be saying this, and this will result in your frustration.
Fundamentally because, live and let live. Only if you know to live, you can let others live. If you don’t know to live, how will you let others live?
Love thy neighbor as you love thyself! If you don’t love yourself, you will not be able to love your neighbor. So even those messiahs, the prophets, the incarnations were very, very clear.
You can only give the world what you have! If I have ignorance, then I can share my ignorance with the world. If I have clarity, I can share clarity with the world! If I have prosperity, I can share prosperity with the world.
If I have only poverty, I can only share my poverty with the world. If I have solutions, I can share my solutions with the world.
If every thought of mine is only a problem, then I can only share problems with the world.
If I have confidence, I can infuse confidence in others. I have only diffidence. I’m all the time nervous. I’m all the time feeling vulnerable and fragile.
How will I inspire anybody else to be confident in life? I cannot give the world what I have. So wholeheartedly, it’s not possible to love the world, unless you love yourself.
You’ll never be able to do that. You’re in control of yourself, you can lead others. You don’t feel in control of yourself, then you’ll never be able to lead others.
So, anything that you have to give to the world, first has to be there in you. You feel beautiful when you love yourself. The spillover of that, everybody will bask in your love, and there’ll be no sense of “I sacrificed” in that love.
Sacrifice is a judgment that the world has to cast on you. If you feel you sacrificed, you’ve already vulgarized that sacrifice.
The world has to say Mahatma Gandhi sacrificed a successful barrister’s life, for the sake of the nation. If Mahatma Gandhi feels he sacrificed something for the sake of this, then that’s not sacrifice at all.
The children must feel, the mother has sacrificed so much for my sake. If the mother herself feels “I sacrifice so much for the sake of my children.”…
You feel you sacrificed, only when you are begging for recognition. This thought that you sacrifice will come to you, only when you feel you’re not being acknowledged, you’re not being recognized for whatever you’re doing.
And that craving in you to be acknowledged, to be appreciated, to be recognized, makes you say, “I sacrifice so much.”, which means you’ve already started begging.
And what you beg and get, is never fulfilling. If you beg somebody for love, even if you get that love, you’ll still find yourself begging.
Whatever! You beg for some help and you get that help, even after you get that help, you’ll still find yourself begging. What you get by begging, is never fulfilling.
And you have to transcend this begging. The instant you ever feel… If Mahatria ever feels, I sacrificed all my Sundays for twenty-two years for the sake of infinitheist, it simply means Mahatria has developed a craving, that infinitheist should all come and say, “You sacrificed this.”.
I’m developing a craving, that’s when I’ll get this feeling.
Otherwise, I’ll never get this feeling. You can make a judgment that Mother Teresa sacrificed so much for the sake of the world. If Mother Teresa feels I sacrificed so much, that means she’s beginning to crave.
For the sake of my husband, I have sacrificed so much. The day you feel, you’re essentially saying, I want my husband to go and tell the world, it’s all because of me.
You’re beginning to beg. So, when there is a sense of sacrifice in your love, you are just begging the world around you, to tell you are so loving.
And that’s not a great state to be in. And the only way that sense of sacrifice will not be there in what you do, is you’ve got to love yourself, and the spillover of your love, everybody else will be able to bask in your love.
It’s not about being a man or it’s not about being a woman. It’s about cherishing who I am. I show my respect for the manufacturer, by the way I celebrate the product. By cherishing who I am, I’m showing respect to the wisdom that created me.
Somewhere in the scheme of things, you are supposed to be a woman. Somewhere in the scheme of things, he was supposed to be a man. Somewhere in the scheme of things, there is a reason that you look the way you look.
You are an integrated package of certain bodily definitions. The way you think, your value system.
Those emotions in you, those beautiful side in you, those little less beautiful sides about you, all of us are integrated package.
We actually live an extraordinary life. I think it’s easy to be God. I think it’s very easy to be God. You have to follow a system. It isn’t easy being human.
How many different situations you’ve faced in life? How many egos you have sacrificed in life? What tears, what smile, what sense of responsibility towards, doing the best you can do in every role of your life, owning up the responsibility for people to do well in life?
To be formless is easy. It’s being electricity. You are a system. But living in form, in such a volatile life, ever-changing, every moment is different.
Every moment is different! If you are a Himalayas, if you are a Pacific Ocean, if you are a Jupiter, if you’re planet Earth, even if you are God, the formless…
You’re not facing life with changes every moment, but the life that all of you have chosen, every moment, life changes, every moment, we are dealing with the fragility of human ego, which is changing at your end, and at the other end, and in all these things, the sort of life that each one of you have created for yourself, is the sort of aspirations you have front of you, I want you to cherish who you are.
I want you to celebrate who you are. I want from deep inside in every cell, for you to believe. The best thing God could have done was, you were created as you, and as nobody else. And let that cherishing of yourself.
Express itself, which will be that beautiful you, and the world will also be able to cherish. Truly in respect of… Each one of you, loving you so much. Thank you.