Here is a loving attempt to explain the bliss of love…
On whom has the ‘Idiot Box’ not cast a spell on? There may be a few exceptional breed of people who do not entertain the ‘TV’ as part of their beloved family, I am quite certain that I do not belong to that category. Sunday afternoons are probably the laziest part of the week for everyone and I normally spend the time in front of the idiot box, all alone, when the rest of the family enjoys a siesta. I normally enjoy the ‘me and the idiot box’ time together.
That Sunday afternoon turned out to be different. I am a channel surfer and I keep flipping between channels all the time. But for some reason unknown to me, I held onto one channel, a bit longer on that day. I realized the remote in my hand had remained static for almost two hours. I was immersed in an experience beyond the boundaries that time would define. The movie that I was engrossed so much was ‘The Notebook’. The story was so good and well narrated that I wished that my husband was there with me. If I elaborate the content of the movie here, the thrill of watching it may be lost; but to set the context of this article, I will have to write a small brief here.
Love at first sight is not something from a fable for a lot of us. So was the case with the two main characters of this masterpiece. The story runs through the reels of time when the lady suffers from Alzheimer disease in her old age and she forgets everything from the past. The major part of the story revolves around how the husband relives the past, for her and for them, through a small diary ‘Notebook’. At one point she asks him if he thinks their love for each other is strong enough to ‘take them away together’; he replies that he thinks their love can do anything. So true, love can do anything and everything.
To me the movie was all about the power of love on humanity and how even after death it prevails. His grace created a small space in our hearts for love, which is even larger than the universe He has created for us. I spent the rest of the afternoon in solitude, my eyes swelled with tears, trying to understand what more HE can give us than this wonderful gift called love.
Many couples spend such a lot of time fighting with each other on very trivial things which even lead to divorce. Our culture teaches us that the institution of marriage is far beyond the mundane, a bond that even transcends the physical. On the wedding day, we make a commitment to each other; that is not mere murmurings in front of the audience, a ritual to be followed; it is far beyond that. The commitment is to remain in everlasting love, no matter what challenges life throws us into.
A rush of all those beautiful thoughts and ‘untold’ commitments I made in my wedlock, engulfed me. I understood not a bit of anything had changed since then, in spite of all the trivial day to day fights and misunderstanding that we may have had. My prayer from that day onwards is: ‘My dear Lord, what a great gift You have given me! Thank you. Please let me remember the gift of love each day and melt in it every moment of life.’ I wouldn’t ask Him for more, would I? He has given love in abundance for not only me, but to all.
Ardhanareshwara, one of his countless manifestations represents the Shakthi and Shiva, as one, is it not? He exhibits the powerful yet subtle womanhood and the strong yet gentle manhood, sharing equal space and bringing about serenity and harmony in life.
That wonderful evening helped me to realize the beautiful institution called marriage, far better than what I had so far experienced. Distinct in physical existence as we are, we need to believe that differences exist and they have to be cherished with the common purpose of celebrating life together.
Certain things may never change in our lives. I may never learn to make his favourite meal and he may never learn to even make a tea. I may never attempt to know about his investments and he may never attempt to attend the PTA meets of our children. I may never remember his car number and he may never remember our wedding day. The list goes on and on… Yet, at the heart of the hearts, we know there would be more and more love between us with each fight and argument. I would be there where he is and he would be there where I am.
Certain things are not meant to change.
I am He and He is Me.