The blow was severe… What made them stand with strength?
About 6 months ago, my family received an award from the hands of our beloved guru, Mahatria. On the trophy, the words delicately carved were, ‘The Power of We’. He spoke about how as a family we could overcome stage-4 brain cancer that my Mother was diagnosed with in 2013. Medically, the situation was bleak and we were given very few days. Spiritually, our guru firmly believed that she is a fighter and would see this through. The collective efforts of the family – in changing the diet completely, making air, sunshine, love and meditation a regular part of her day – along with the faith in our guru, has ensured that now, in 2017, she is not just alive but alive and kicking and does yoga for 2 hours, laughs, learns and loves to make a difference. The best part is, she has not taken a single medicine in the last 4 years.
I somehow do not like writing about this. And yet, often my fingers make me type because we realize there are so many in our situation who may not know what to do, or where to look out for help. I know how helpless I have felt, at times, despite having so much support and a spiritual fence around me. So, writing this, because I must.
What does the phrase, ‘The power of we’, mean to me? I really believe that had even one person in our immediate family of 4 been missing, the energy grid would have been incomplete and I don’t know if we would have seen the miracle unfold as we did. My father is that cool as a cucumber person who remained strong and neutral through all the craziness and ups and downs that cancer did bring with it. My sister, being a physiotherapist by profession and someone who takes keen interest in eastern medicines could find the right naturopath and combine it with exercises that helped. I have been a meditator for more than a decade and I played my part in bringing Silence and peace to her body and our home. And finally, mom herself, whose surrender to her Mahatria, and non-questioning, non-judgmental, unconditional acceptance to what is, enabled her to move through the entire disease, treatment and healing as a warrior… a conqueror.
Receiving the award made us realize just how important each one of us was to this journey. It also made me realize how much we underestimate this incredible unit called family. So often we keep seeking for things outside of home – love, peace, solutions – and yet often, life keeps them closer than we could ever imagine. All of us are not good at everything. But each of us is good at something – and when we become one force, beginning at home itself, everything begins to start flowing in a magical way.
I have come to realize that the answer to the world, lies in the answer to a country. The answer to a country, lies in the answer to a city. The answer to a city, lies in the answer to each home. If we can somehow get the home environment right, the peace, the love, the goodness that radiates from there, starts taking over the neighborhood and spreads its light in a significant way to the world at large.
Instead of bickering about differences, we need to find a way in which we can complement each other. For instance, my husband Arun is a perfectionist and wants the house in perfect order. Whereas me? Well, I like tidiness but it’s not my top priority. Earlier all our arguments used to be around me not putting something in its place. I used to get very ego involved and silly arguments would turn into heated fights. Now, I simply try my best and have told Arun – where I fail, gently remind me and we will help each other. Somehow instead of working against each other, we now work with each other to keep our home in a beautiful state. We are so much more peaceful.
All of us are not good at everything. But each of us is good at something – and when we become one force, beginning at home itself, everything begins to start flowing in a magical way.
My Mother would sometimes go into the kitchen and leave a tap on or sometimes even the gas. This used to lead to stress. Now we have a simple system of her using the kitchen when we are around and one of us always checks up post her usage. We don’t want to curtail her work at all, and yet, ensure her safety and avoid wastage.
Little little shifts that we have brought into the home – a place for everything, everything in its place; systems for all the work that is repetitive; reviews for the helpers to ensure smooth functioning has made all of us so much happier. Time that would be wasted in chores or disagreements is invested in laughing, discussing dreams and meditating.
The family is our first and immediate circle of influence. If we can get things right here, the golden ring extends and embraces so many more. I am seeing this unfold before me for the very first time. There is so much strength in the power of we – in complementing each other rather than competing, in believing at the very core – we are in it together, and we will make things more beautiful than they ever were. ‘The power of We’, have you discovered it?