When do I decide to give up on a relationship?

When this question has come… Only when you think it’s time to give up on a relationship, this question itself will come, should I give up on a relationship? Because otherwise this question does not come?

When did you ask this question, should I give up on my father because he’s a little imperfect? When did you ask this question?

When did you ever get this question, I should give up on my children, because they are not living up to my expectations didn’t come no? This question comes only when you are tilting towards wanting to give up on a relationship, otherwise, this question does not come. You wouldn’t have asked me this question, if you’re not actually ready.

In your mind, you feel it’s not worth it anymore.

It’s taking away my happiness. It’s taking away my peace. It’s taking away my love. It’s taking away my self-respect. And I think so much sacrifice is not worth this relationship. In your mind, you are looking for endorsement from Mahatria. You have decided. But we all need endorsement for our decision. Sometimes on our own, we don’t want… So, we are hoping somebody will say, leave it.

And now you can say Mahatria said, I should leave. So, I… So, put it on him and take the decision. So, you’re just looking for endorsement. But in your mind, this question has already come.

Let me use something we have already discussed. When I execute a choice, I get four consequences. It can be more than what I expect, less than what I expect, what I expect or the opposite of what I expect.

Irrespective of what I get, I go back and execute a counter choice. I’m going on executing counter choice. But no matter how many counter choice I execute, I’m only repeatedly getting opposite of what I expect.

If somewhere I’m getting opposite of what I expect, I do a counter choice. Again, I’m getting opposite of what I expect, again I execute a counter choice. Now it has become less than what I expect, there is improvement.

I think there is progress. I’m again executing, I’m getting less than what I expected. I’m again executing, less than what I expect, I’m again executing a counter choice. Now I’m getting what I expect, there is progress there. No matter how many counter choice I’m executing, I’m only getting the opposite of what to expect.

I think that’s a stage where you have to understand, I’m standing under a mango tree and oranges are not going to come. How many ever stones I’m throwing in the tree, Orange is not falling. At some stage, I will have to realize, maybe the rest of my life is not worth it on this. I think at some stage you will have to take that decision.

And say that, let me give my entire energy to another relationship rather than getting stuck here.

But I’m giving you another template, because there is a lot of questions on this about getting back a relationship. Lot of questions on this…

I’m giving you a two-line template and I want all of you to register this. Forget about all the other answers, I want you to register this.

Even if love is lost in a relationship, the relationship can still be revived back to loving base. I repeat. Even if love is lost in a relationship, that relationship can be revived back to loving ways.

But if there is no more respect in that relationship, there is no future in that relationship.

I do not know of a single relationship…

She cares a damn for you. Whether you suffer, whether you struggle, whether you’re going to dogs, whether you become an alcoholic, whether you’re threatening to commit suicide, whether you’re hurting yourself, whether she hears from everybody else, no matter how many times you call…

I’m using a ‘She’ it can be a ‘He’.

Now that person has absolutely no respect for you, or your life, or your words, or what you’re going through anymore.

In fact, he or she is comfortable without you.

It’s come to a stage where what you’re going through is not causing any feeling in the other person anymore.

Which means the other person has lost respect for you.

Even if somehow, you get to coexist in a relationship, you will only coexist in a relationship there is no future in that relationship… You can coexist, under one roof in the name of friends or in the name of partners or in the name of husband and wife or in the name of father and daughter, in the name of mother and son, in the name of brother and sister. You can coexist in a relationship.

But there is no future in that relationship… I do not know of a single relationship, where the other person has utter disregard towards you and no respect for you anymore, that the relationship has ever been turned around. So, I repeat these two sentences – Even if love is lost, but respect is there, there is future in the relationship.

But if there… even if you are together in a relationship but there is no respect from the other person towards you.

At best you can coexist in a relationship. But there is no Prem, Sath, Chith, Anand in that relationship anymore, there’s no future in that relationship.

Even if love is lost, you can get back that relationship into loving ways. But if respect is lost, there is absolutely no future in that relationship.